Support Groups

Rose and I are out to support a friend of ours at her reading tonight. She writes her own blog called Dr. Write if you want to get to know her.

This brings the question to mind on the idea of support: How do you support those around you that are published, getting published, or are trying to get published? How do you develop a community of writers that really offer support and not judgement?

I've been a part of writing groups in the past, where once their needs were met, they stopped being a supportive group. I've also been a part of groups that had nothing to do with writing but found great support with those few who also "wrote on the side."

I've also been a part of a group where it naturally took its course and tapered off but left me with an amazing writing partner (yes, that would be you, Rose).

I've yet to try the virtual writing group and see if I can offer support there or receive it. Rose is a bit braver than me there.

What about you? How do you find your support groups for writing? Who do you ask to read your work?

Finding a good support group involves trust and allowing yourself to be vulnerable. To reach out is hard, to be burned and continue to reach out is even harder. But how else will we find each other if we never try?

Does the agenting process work?

Nathan asks another good question.

http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/NathanBransford/~3/v--V52HB7yk/can-i-get-ruling-do-you-think-query.html

Takeover!

Never mind writer etiquette this is more like plain common sense. When you go to a coffee shop you buy their coffee and their food. What you do not do is stage a takeover. As I've said before our current writing haunt is great but - and luckily this was around the time we would usually be leaving - in came the takeover. An entire family, who proceeded to unpack their picnic lunch and play with their kids indoors, which led to the dropping child on head incident which led to some serious screaming. If this was one of those every-person cafes then fine - I suppose. This place is popular with students who actually want to study and because Cactus is a teacher she knows about it. These people were not student-y. I think we'll use the quiet section next week.

Joining the Colony and one distracted Writer

This week in the course of my list of submissions - I keep 10 out at any one time - I came across an online community for mostly unpublished writers. I read the intro and signed up. Its a supportive and encouraging environment which I've only been a part of for a couple of days but I really like the whole idea and the people I've spoken with online are all welcoming and interested in you and your writing.

This morning we went to our usual writing haunt and managed to bag the 'good' seats but I was having one of those mornings where my ears are working my fingers. I do wish people wouldn't have business meetings in coffee shops - that's what boardrooms are for!

Writer etiquette

When I write out of the house I want to go somewhere where I can camp (see previous post by that name) without getting in the way or pissing the staff off. I love our current venue but it does have a few drawbacks. The other week our usual spot was occupied but it wasn't a problem. This week same thing, only its a very drunk guy - passed out. His friends turned up later and in the end they all left together. We acknowledged them, it would be rude not to but I draw the line when complete strangers ask me to go shopping for them and they'll give me half what I spend in cash. I mean you honestly think I'm going to abandon my friend and go with three people I've never met. There's charitable and there's asking for trouble. So if you see a person writing in a coffee shop, by all means smile and if they say hi assume normal politeness rules so if they stop talking and go back to their work let them be, but never ever
a) ask them what they're writing
b) look over their shoulder and try to read what they're writing
c) ask them for a lift (yeah weird but it has happened)
d) ask them for money (the average writer is in as much fiscal distress as you are)
e) propose marriage (not cool dude, so not cool)

What's in it for me?

As Rose mentioned, why we write is part of a journey. The journey really. If I always questioned "what's in it for me?" I'd never stop to see the beauty in the art of "just doing."

But, let's examine the question as this question often follows the other one --why write?

What in it for me?

Fame--being recognized by many and having good seats at a game would be a few perks I am sure, as would publicly airing my laundry

Fortune--money would be up there at the top, because let's face it, if you don't have the money to DO anything, you are still just a poser. So "give me money (that's what I want)"

Public recognition--I would love to quit my day job and sit in a room typing and have that be considered a worthy endeavor, instead of a hobby.

Be coined "a real writer"--not like those fake ones you see typing in an empty room or coffee shop.

What's REALLY in it for me right now?

Well, certainly not fame or fortune, and I am still at work....so coining myself a real writer is really where it's at. I am just learning to form the words--I am a writer--without immediately making excuses for it. And, maybe next in line of importance is the fact that others around me are also taking me seriously as a writer.

So, bottom line?

I write because I am a writer.

Why do I write?

It's a question that keeps popping up. There are many reasons, the main one being I enjoy writing. If something is stuck in my head it makes a lot more sense to get it down on paper so to speak than have it rattling around in my brain. Reason number two it's my form of expression. Other people paint, sculpt, tell jokes, hang off the sides of cliffs, knit, cook, etc. Of course the stated goal of every writer is to get published and while that would be cool it won't change my life because that isn't the way life works. I already have the life I want, being a published author would be the cherry on top but wouldn't stop me from hanging out with friends, sleeping through the radio alarm or forgetting to unplug the kettle. In a recent rejection letter they said 'there's no doubt that this has potential' so for now I'm going to enjoy the journey and not worry about the destination. Wow that's deep for one in the afternoon.